Hiding and Seeking on Pesach

Tonight we will take a feather, a spoon, and a candle and search our homes for Chametz (Bedikat Chametz). Many even have the custom of putting out 10 pieces of bread for the children to find [if you do, make sure someone writes down all 10 spots so that you don't miss one!]. Symbolically, we are reminded to search and destroy not only the physical crumbs of Chametz, but the spiritual crumbs as well, cleansing ourselves of any character traits which do not reflect our true nature.

I was thinking about this theme of hiding and seeking and realized that it shows up throughout the Pesach holiday:

-For 430 years Hashem was "hiding" and waiting for the exact moment when He could fulfill His promise to Avraham to redeem Bnei Yisrael from Egypt (Rashi Shemot 12:42). 

-Moshe also was hiding out in Midyan, and according to the Midrash (Shemot Rabbah 2:2) he was searching for his missing sheep when he came across the Burning Bush.

-During Makkat Bechorot, Bnei Yisrael are hiding in their homes while God strikes the Egyptian Firstborn.

-According to the Talmud (Sotah 13a), while everyone else is in a rush to leave (to the extent that they did not even have time for the dough to rise!) Moshe is running around Egypt looking for Yosef's bones, because he knows they will not be able to leave unless they fulfill their promise to take Yosef's bones with them.

-On the Shabbat of Pesach we read Megillat Shir HaShirim, Song of Songs, which uses an allegory of a lover searching for his soulmate to depict our search for God in our lives.

-At the Pesach Seder we do many things "to get the children to ask" such as hiding the Matzot/Seder Plate. We want them to be alert, to notice things, to ask questions.

-We open the door for Eliyahu HaNavi, searching to see if he has visited our homes (does anyone else check the Kos Shel Eliyahu to see if the wine level seems to be lower?].

-And of course, we hide the Afikoman and have the children search for it. [some families have the children then rehide it and make the adults search as well.]

Why all this hiding and seeking on Pesach?

Let's focus in a little more on the search for the Afikoman. The step of the Seder when we find and then eat the Afikoman is called צפון, which means hidden. It is related, I think, to the word מצפה, which means to expect or look forward to something [like the Rashi quoted above who says that Hashem was looking forward to ("מצפה") the day of redemption for 430 years]. 

You see, when something is hidden or unclear we have two choices. We can move on and ignore it, or we can search for it. It depends how important it is to us. I remember, as a child, playing Hide and Go Seek with my friends during recess. Everyone wanted to have a turn to Seek. You had to close your eyes and count to 30 while everyone else hid, And then you could run around and find everyone. It was fun to hide and not be caught. But it was even more fun to find everyone as the seeker. Of course, every once in a while there would be someone whose hiding spot was so good that no one could find them. At first this would be fun, with all the kids trying to help the seeker find the last holdout. But after a couple of minutes people would just give up and say something like "come out come out wherever you are! You win! We're starting a new round!" 

Maybe Pesach is coming to remind us that Hashem is always close to us. He loves us and wants to connect. But we have to do our part to seek Him out. Geulah (Redemption) comes only when we search for it.

We all search for things in our lives. We search for a soulmate with whom to share our journey. We search for the keys to building our families and having children. We search for a career that is meaningful and fulfilling. We search for friends and mentors, meaning and growth. Sometimes those searches take longer than others. It can feel, at times, pointless. The temptation to throw in the towel, rather than continue searching, is there. And we have to make a choice. Are we going to give up and move on, settle for the status quo, or keep searching until we find what we are looking for? When something is צפון (hidden) will we keep being מצפה (looking forward and expecting to eventually find it)?

I wish us all this Pesach that we should find the beauty in the search itself (not just in the end result). Put out those 10 pieces of bread. Open the door for Eliyahu. Hide that Afikoman. Because sometimes it is the search itself which builds character and strength and faith, even when it takes longer than we hoped.